There is a scripture I used to hear in church a lot when I was young that I never fully understood. In Galatians 6:7, it says that “whatever one sows, that will he also reap.” I remember being so confused by what that meant until now.
So to clear that up for you, let’s do a quick definition check.
To sow means to”plant (seed) by scattering it on or in the earth” and to reap means to”cut or gather (a crop or harvest).”
Okay, so now that we have our definitions down, let me tell you about my last year. Last year was a year of sowing for me. This time last year, I was beyond scared about my future. It wasn’t as if I didn’t have a direction I was going toward; that was actually quite clear for me. I just felt so unqualified to move in that direction because of the little voice in the back of my head that kept telling me, “Who are you to do this…you have too many things counting you out.”
It is so easy to tell someone to ignore that little voice because what it is saying isn’t true; however, what it was saying to me was true. I did have a lot of things counting me out. It wasn’t lying. According to the world’s bell curve of worthiness, I wasn’t qualified. However, although that nagging voice in the back of my head felt loud and constant, God’s voice just so happened to be louder. Now when I say His speaking was loud, it wasn’t loud like the one in the back of my head trying to count me out. It was almost like a gentle whisper. It was calm, like it wasn’t worried, like it knew that I knew what to do. The voice felt like it trusted me, or some version of me, more than I did. To hear it, I had to stop moving because even the shuffle of my feet disrupted the transmission of communication. I had to get really quiet (which, oh my goodness, can be so hard at times), often pausing and murmuring, “Wait, what was that?” The negative voice in the back of my head telling me that I could not was loud, but for some reason, God’s whisper counting me in was so much louder. So I listened to it.
I kept working even though I had no idea how I would pull it off. Like, y’all, I had NO idea how I would pull it off. I mean, I had been sowing for what felt like years at this point for a harvest that was not promised. I would be lying to you if I told you that I was not tired and ready to give up. Oh goodness. I was so tired of feeling like I was not enough. And before you ask, yes. I read my Bible and listened to sermons, yet I felt so alone and exhausted. I hadn’t seen my parents, and I missed my best friends from back home. But I knew (or maybe it was inner me that knew) that my obedience would be rewarded.
When God tells you to move, specifically when He gives one of His daughters a vision, purpose, instruction, and she moves in accordance, the ground shifts, the sun shines a little brighter, and the enemy gets nervous. So I moved towards the vision He had given me, sowing faithfully every single day because I missed the sun.
Some days were good, and I felt like, “Yes, God! Let’s do this.” And there were other days where I cried nonstop, feeling so inadequate and incapable of completing the mission that God has given me. I mean, do you know that feeling? Like when the mission from God is so clear, but when you look around you, it just seems like you made it all up in your head? It literally feels horrible, and you feel almost like a child. Perhaps that it the point. Our Father wants us to remind us of our childlikeness; like a child, we trust him when we don’t understand and like a Father, he leads us to where we are supposed to be. (Ooooo chile…go sit on that for a bit.)
Through it all, I stayed obedient. Well, for the most part. I am not anywhere near perfect, which is why I spent a lot of time on my knees. I prayed for strength and endurance between my wet, teary sniffles. I asked almost daily, “God, what am I doing?” Then, it got to a point where I kind of just decided that regardless of what it looked like in front of me, I was going to keep putting one foot in front of the other towards the goal. I mean, I had made it this far trusting Him and going backward felt…wrong. But let me tell you, the sowing was hard and long. My hands got dirty, my elbows bloody and bruised. And there were more days than not where I thought I would bear fruit, and something entirely out of my control would kill off my crops causing me to start over.
Months and years have passed, and I am sitting in a harvest season. When I was young, I heard about the stories of “harvesting” or “the harvest” in the Bible. You know, “the harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few.” Or all the countless times Jesus showed up with like three fish and everyone was like, “Um, sir. How is this going to feed everybody?” But then it did.
Sister, it did, and it does. The harvest seemed like it wasn’t enough, but it was beyond more than enough.
When you are in a sowing season for a long time (and to be honest, perhaps we are always in some way in a sowing season), it can be easy to forget that there will be a season for harvest. And as I write this to you, I am sitting in the promise of harvest right now. Let this be my testimony. I am resting in the fruit of last season’s obedience and discipline, seated in that peace that transcends all understanding. I know that these peaceful waters won’t last forever, but if you needed any reminder that God is good, here it is. In one of my devotionals (of course, I can’t remember which one), it says, “God is good. God is good to me. God is good at being God.” I hope that brings you comfort.
If you are reading this and in a sowing season, sis, stay the course. If the vision is not clear for you, get still. Yes, the doubtful voices feeding your insecurities will still sound very loud and probably won’t go away, but just sit long enough to hear His gentle whisper. Stay close to God. Be mindful of what you are feeding your soul. Because the harvest is plentiful, sister.
If you are reading this and it is time for harvest, sister. Well done. Well done. Well done.
You deserve to sit in that harvest. When it was raining, snowing, and the sun felt like it was in quarantine, you sowed faithfully. I pray that you give glory to God through gratitude and joy; do with it what He has called you to do with it. Well done, sister.
May your harvest season be fruitful and filled with gratitude until it is time to sow again.
Remember, if you let it, the harvest will be plentiful.
God is good. God is good to you. God is good at being God.
